This page provides the details of Crit Juice, Episode 12, which was recorded as part of session three.

Listen to Episode 12

Drinking Gods Rules
In addition to the Golden Rules, the following applied to this episode:

  • "Whenever you reach exactly zero hit points, take a shot." Submitted by Jesse, AKA Kilojegs, AKA GMBoos.
  • "Everytime someone says the word 'Princess,' you must all toast her with a drink." Submitted by @dunkbailey
  • "When a player uses an action point, that player must finish their drink before they can use that action point." Submitted by @winterwolves
  • "Drink whenever someone you thought was a friend turns out to be a bad guy." Submitted by @skeet290
  • "Drink whenever a role-playing conversation goes poorly for the player." From @VindiKSean.



Crit Deck Cards
Pulled by Dar’Jjjeeki – you cut an artery that instantly bursts blood in a three by three square, all enemies in that square are blinded, save ends, including the one you hit. Submitted by the Typing dice.


The group faces off against Azmak, Azmar's brother and the manager of the Midnight Fire, they charm and drink and drink and charm. The group continues to pretend to be different people.

Dar'Jjeeki says he is Arience from Rankiki
Arience says he is Dar'Jjeeki from Rankiki
Doc is Doc… A rich Doctor from Maraposa
Wolf is from Talihoo says he is Chase
Gub says he is Lou Gricks from Talihoo

Doc bores Azmak about being a sword merchant. Arience ‘Dar’Jjeeki’ says he got into a lot of trouble as a kid and started to talk more and more like Azmak, which Azmak quickly points out. Azmak questions Dar’Jjeeki ‘Arience’ about being the ‘Prince’ of Rankiki, he complains about ‘Thunderblood’ and Azmak agrees, Azmak continues to ask Dar’Jjeeki about being a Prince. Dar’Jjeeki describes the throne room of Rankiki as having three windows that represent the three lords of Rankiki, ‘Ralph, Maggie, and Sho-sho-sho’. Azmak doesn’t seem impressed. At this point another dancer takes over an Eladrin with extensions in her hair.

Azmak turns to Gub ‘Lou Gricks’ and thinks he recognizes him, but manages to convince Azmak that ‘Gub T. Montgomery’ is a stupid name. Azmak turns his questions to Wolf ‘Chase’, describes himself as a jack of all trades, and challenges Azmak to a grapple contest (something they do all the time in Talihoo). The wager is 500 GP. Azmak grabs Wolf and tickles him a little. Wolf continues to be trapped until he manages to free himself at last, not before Azmak wins the bet.

Azmak starts to ask about the Princess, Dar’Jjeeki says she is part of the royal family of Rankiki… and is mute with a skin condition… that will erupt into boils as soon as she shakes it, that’s why she is covered.

Azmak, drunk and upset with the relationship with his brother starts to spout out the vault combinations, 10, 15, 25, up-down thing on the side. Azmak is removed by ‘Rocks’, the crew decides to leave shortly after, on their way out they pass a stage with ‘Dark Pixies’ dancing. Nata is dancing on the main stage morphing between female forms, she gives Gub one last Sad, but vengeful, but hopeful look.

Exiting to the street the air is filled with ashes, there is a base rumble is coming from Kosiv Peak, a brimestorm is brewing up. They rush over to the Lucky Loot Casino. The Lucky Loot is the only place in town where anybody whose anybody is worth anything. Two burly Dragonborn bouncers try to stop the crew at the entrance, telling them to go to ‘Dice Alley’. The group flashes Gralford’s money and they quickly gain entry. The ornate entry hall has a glass window that looks how onto the raging magma heart of the volcanic veins that run throughout Blazestone. They travel up past the gaming rooms into the High Roller Lounge that is a magical floating platform, with large glass windows that look out into the casino and the city streets.

As the group is trying to figure out how to either win or lose a huge some of money, they spot Dovana surrounded by a squad of Azmar’s men pointing up the High Roller area. They only have a matter of seconds. They quickly make a beat on Blazestone Hold ‘em, Dar’Jjeeki cracks his knuckles to step up. Everyone puts in their money together. The 10000 GP bet is made, the dealer deals, Dar’Jjeeki bluffs the table, Doc helps figure out how the Casino is cheating, however they lose it all. They sweep the gold towards the vault immediately. Wolf drops his cloak and goes invisible running towards the vault area. Once the doors are open the dealer enters the vault area and the doors shut behind him, there are three guards in the vault area with invisible Wolf.

Wolf opens the door and lets everyone in, allowing the crew to attack. As the doors swing open, Chase bites the closest guard. Arience casts beguiling strand? Against the guards making one of them slam his head into the wall. Dar’Jjeeki cast energy strobe – the last Guard is blown into the air spraying blood everywhere.

The Doors of the casino is kicked open, yelling that the vault needs to be locked down. Gub leads rushes towards the Main Vault. Wolf and Dar’Jjeeki pick up the groups gold. Rushing into the main vault they are faced with a massive round steal door enchanted with magical wards. There are three combination entry locations and a large wheel like from a ship in the middle of the door. They enter the combination the lever appears they toggle it up and down and the door swings open revealing a large vault filled with riches and a large object in the middle of it covered in the tarp. The roof is supported by four Dragonborn statue. The group starts to load up Dar’Jjeeki’s backpack, the vault door swings closed, standing in front of it is a tough looking black scaled Dragonborn, covered in Scars, over his face is a full Gladiator-like mask. He greets Gub, Gub recognizes him instantly calling him Tormod.

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